Jan 25 2012

Messing it up

The biological clock wakes me up perfectly at 6 o’ clock everyday. But on weekdays I just snooze and on weekends I get up without any hassle. Its this amazingly regular irregularity that I possess, amazes me most of the times. I sit down idly staring out of the window and bang at that moment I find an idea to write something about. But I just feel lazy and don’t bother and idea just withers away slowely. I feel it actually melting inside me. The pain of that moment is undefinable as it is pretty abstract in nature.
An idea.. that’s all that I’ve got. I need to write it down and actually make any sense out of it. But seriously it feels like a chore. Because basically its an idea. The very fact that it appeals to me means it has to be something out of the ordinary. If it is actually out of the ordinary, there are high chances that it is got to be a little bit weird and it is a little bit weird almost certainly implies that it is crazy. Now the chore begins. To make a weird idea actually make sense when elaborated elaborately. That is kinda buzzkill. ‘Buzzkill’ is actually an interesting word. I don’t remember right now where I learnt it. But it must be from some TV Series or a movie. Now looking back at the last sentence I actually feel lame since those two are the only sources from where I can learn any word, since for last two-three years, I haven’t read a book. And now I feel much lamer since I do read a lot of news and articles on net and it might have been from there and still I couldn’t figure this option out before writing the last sentence. Well, doesn’t matter. Where were we? Yes. The buzzkill chore.
But far more buzzkill is the fact that I work almost 9 hours a day in an office. Well, to some it might sound normal but not me. I hate the aforementioned fact. So comparatively the chore of elaborating on a crazy idea that might fetch a few praises from the few people who do read my blog is more soothing than the 9 hour office time. But you know what? Office hours pay me and they do pay me good. So here I am signing off.. going to watch some cool TV Series or a nice and/or messed up movie, coz the chore of elaborating the idea that just crossed my mind is something I don’t want to do. I would rather feel it melt inside me slowely while I obsess over the fantastic world inside some fiction, which is actually a weird idea elaborately elaborated by someone else who, gets paid for doing exactly that.

Apr 26 2010

Loud Thinking

It was around 6 years back, when I first started writing blog. It was a very innocent start. A friend had initiated the original thought. He was a newbie and I was supposedly the older user, but it was a skewed proportion of Internet knowledge that differentiated us. He was better off doing it. I just competed or rather tried to compete. Times passed, we fought on blogs, I usually being the more immature of the two. But important thing was we were blogging. He made some others in our circle also to start blogging. Suddenly a huge chunk of us had a blog to our names. Slowly people dropped, even the more gifted of us were largely infrequent. He, the most gifted still had a lot to say and wrote his points of view clearly. Whereas I who adamantly wrote something, though may not be up to the standard. But important thing was I still wrote. Whatever I could, even senseless, moronic, but I continued. Meanwhile, to compete with this dude, I even started using B2Evo, when he was using Wordpress. As usual, my arrogance of using something different was at work. Everything was running fine. My ’sometimes good sometimes bad’ blogging continued. Many of us had already given up blogging to cope with Post-Engineering life. I was wandering around in famous blogs on Internet and understanding why I could not write that way. Then, I decided to change gears. Shifted to Wordpress, and decided to be more honest and dedicated to blogging. Instead of being just impulsive, I decided to give it a better thought. Then, this blog started. Its around six months now. I even read my old blogs again, my old comments on friends’ blogs. And I have learned how much scope is there to improve. I never felt better about blogging than now. And ironically my friend has almost stopped blogging. He says he has no time anymore. The reason I am writing all this today, is the presence of my new found love – “Blogging in Marathi”. I owe my better English Speaking abilities to my “howsoever it may be, but”- frequent blogging. But, writing in my mother tongue has always been a pleasure since Childhood. When Unicode made it miraculously easy to Blog in Marathi. It took me until this January to discover this miracle. I started blogging in Marathi also and my Marathi blogs started capturing more of imagination since it came more naturally to me. Also, due to certain limitations of my web host, this blog of mine could not connect to a big Marathi blog index. Thus, I had to make my old “Blogger” blog alive and I started crossposting the Marathi posts there. Slowly, my Marathi Blog started receiving more traffic. But, my penchant for writing in English also hasn’t died down. But yes, I do fear that I may start neglecting my first love. Sometimes, I can’t even think of anything to write. Whereas, I have a list of topics to write on in Marathi. Today was such a day, I was blank. What to write? I am fed up of run of the mill news and unfortunately nothing interesting has caught my attention yet. I don’t know why I scribbled so much today. Its intention is to keep my spirits up. Just to tell my first love that I will never let you down. I still belong to you, though may not be in entirety. I hereby resolve to keep writing in English too. And that too on diverse topics as I used to do till date. Signing off on that note.

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